


Making up for Lost Time

by tangowhiskey



Series: An Affair to Remember [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Bottom Castiel, Hurt/Comfort, Infidelity, M/M, Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Top Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-11
Updated: 2013-11-11
Packaged: 2018-01-01 03:19:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1039721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tangowhiskey/pseuds/tangowhiskey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Written for a prompt; the full prompt is inside]</p>
<p>Cas is in a relationship with Dick Roman, who is so busy with his political aspirations, that Cas feels neglected.</p>
<p>When his ex-boyfriend, Dean Winchester, calls him unexpectedly, Cas can't help but meet up with him. He falls in love with Dean all over again, and embarks on an affair with him, because they were just meant to be together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Making up for Lost Time

**Author's Note:**

> Written for this prompt on spn_kink:
> 
> Dean and Cas had been together for years. And then they broke up. Years later, Dean comes back into town. Cas is seeing someone else. But old feelings are hard to kill, and Dean and Cas start seeing each other again in secret.
> 
> Dean waits until the other guy leaves or isn't around, and then sneaks into Castiel's place and they start their affair. It's hot, passionate, making up for lost time. Maybe they do it on the kitchen table, maybe against the window just for the thrill.
> 
> ****
> 
> This wasn't meant to be so long, but once again, the story ran away from me!

“I’m sorry, Castiel,” Dick says, “But, I’ve really got to go.”

“I know,” Castiel says resigned.

“I’m sorry,” he says again, “I’ll make it up to you at the weekend.”

Dick kisses Castiel on the cheek and then follows his two advisors out of the apartment.

“That’s what you said last week,” Castiel says quietly to the empty room at large.

And so Castiel is once again left in the kitchen, cleaning up after another particularly brief breakfast. It’s been the best part of a year since his boyfriend has had time for anything that doesn’t involve Richard Roman Enterprises. Castiel doesn’t begrudge Dick his success, he really doesn’t, because he knows Dick has spent the past twenty years building the corporation from the once fledgling company he’d founded, and now it’s finally coming to fruition. But at the same time, Castiel feels that some interaction really wouldn’t go amiss.

And lately it’s gotten even worse. No matter how much Dick denies it to the media at large, he _does_ have political aspirations, which means that he’s away for longer than ever before, trying to shore up financial support from other corporations. All in all, he’s gone for weeks at a time.

Castiel isn’t normally one to complain, he really isn’t, but he’s human and he _does_ have needs. Dick has been home for thirty-one hours in the past fortnight, most of which he’d spent asleep. And yes, Castiel actually had counted. 

Dick’s hasty departure just moments ago would see him travel to the other end of the state, and he’d be gone for a week tops. Or at least, that’s what he’d said. Castiel has long learned that Dick gives him the most optimistic timeframe possible, so as to placate his boyfriend. Castiel, though, reckons he’ll be lucky to see his boyfriend again before the month is out.

He’s just finishing cleaning up the kitchen and about to start on the mess that the campaign team have made in the living room when his cellphone rings. He tuts, because who the hell calls at eight in the morning?

“Hello?” He answers tersely.

“Hi.” It’s just one word and it’s spoken so quietly that Castiel thinks he must be imagining the voice, because it can’t be. It’s not possible, not after all this time, and yet the gruff voice is unmistakable.

Castiel grabs his phone a little tighter as if he’s afraid he’ll lose the connection. “Dean?”

“Yeah, it’s me, Cas.”

For Castiel it feels as if time stands still. He hasn’t seen or spoken to Dean Winchester in - what? - six years, ever since they’d gone their separate ways. 

Castiel had met Dean in his first year of university and they had hit it off straight away. They’d had this really intense connection that Castiel had never believed would be possible to share with another human being. And it wasn’t just his imagination, all of their friends had noticed and commented on the chemistry between them.

During the summer vacation, they had done the stereotypical ‘student backpacking in Europe’ thing, and ended up spending more time in various hotel bedrooms rather than actual sightseeing. It had been the best three months of Castiel’s life, and no holiday had yet topped it. 

Back home, in their second year, they had taken the decision to move in together. They’d rented a small studio apartment that was barely big enough for the two of them, but it was _theirs_. Whenever they had invited their friends over, they would inevitable be called ‘an old married couple’ because of the way they’d finish each others sentences. Dean would scoff and Castiel would roll his eyes, but neither actually denied it; because they couldn’t.

They suited each other in every possible way, they’d enjoyed the same music and books, although they’d argued over movies, Dean favouring Westerns whilst Castiel preferred the classics. Sure there had also been more heated arguments between them, over stupid, insignificant things really, but they were worth it, because they would always end up in the most intense make-up sex that Castiel had ever had, more often than not leaving him unable to walk for the best part of a day.

They had remained stronger than ever during their final year and had graduated together, and when Castiel had wanted to do a postgraduate degree, Dean had been there for him and listened when he ranted about the problems he had with his thesis supervisor.

They’d been good together; even aside from the absolutely amazing sex. Everyone had said so. Dean was Castiel’s best friend and Castiel was Dean’s. Dean had always confided in Castiel, telling him things that he wouldn’t even dare _think_ about telling Sam; his fears and his worries that Sam wouldn’t realise his potential. (Not that Dean needed to have worried on that score; Sam turned out fine, just like Castiel had told him he would.)

Even after Castiel had left university and had begun various internships, working all the hours he could and leaving very little time for Dean, who was also working his fingers to the bone; they had ploughed on because they could make this work. And they did. Sure, it was difficult at times, but it was still so good between them, and things remained fresh in the bedroom, so that always helped. 

For those five years they’d been together, everything was perfect.

And then almost overnight, things just fell apart.

The year that Castiel had gotten his ideal job; a job he’d loved, Dean had received a call from his Uncle Bobby in South Dakota. Bobby’s wife had suddenly died and needed Dean’s help in running the garage and scrapyard. Dean hadn’t wanted to leave Castiel behind, but Castiel was equally adamant that he couldn’t leave the job he’d just started, and urged Dean to go and help his uncle out.

It was difficult. They’d mulled over the idea of a long distance relationship, and had many an argument over it - minus the make-up sex - but in the end they decided that it wasn’t really a feasible option. And so they’d reluctantly broken up, but they’d sworn to remain friends and promised to keep in contact with each other.

Not that that promise had lasted for long. Castiel would hear from Dean maybe two times a week, which soon became once fortnight and then less than once a month. Until finally, hearing nothing from Dean became the norm. Castiel didn’t blame Dean - they were technically no longer in a relationship, and he knew that Dean was busy helping his uncle. Besides which, Castiel had no real right to demand anything from Dean - it wasn’t exactly practical to expect his ex to lavish him with attention. But that didn’t mean it was any easier. And it certainly didn’t mean that he didn’t miss him.

“Cas, you still there?” Dean asks worriedly.

“Uh... yeah, yeah, I’m here, Dean,” Cas says, “What’re you... How did you get this number?”

Dean chuckles guiltily. “Your name keeps popping up in the news articles about Dick Roman, and I’ve a friend who’s a technical genius, so I had her get your number for me.”

“You hacked my cell account?” Cas asks almost hysterically.

“No!” Dean replies defensively, “Well, technically it wasn’t _me_... And I dunno if that’s what Charlie actually did, I’ve learned not to ask questions... You know what Cas, what does it matter? The main thing is I have your number and I can talk to you. It’s, uh, it’s been a while.” 

“Yeah, it has,” Cas responds, and he can’t help the bitterness in his voice when he continues, “So, why now?”

Dean pauses. “I’m actually in town, Cas, and I was wondering whether you wanted to meet up maybe? I figure it’d be good to catch up and just... I’d like to see you, Cas.”

“Okay,” Cas says without preamble - and he really needs to analyse that later - “Usual place in an hour?”

Cas can practically see Dean’s smile when he says, “Can’t wait.”

****

The ‘usual place’ happens to be a small, intimate café that they had spent most of their university life in; going to poetry readings with their friends, or just hogging their usual corner of the café: a worn couch that’s tucked away in the corner where they would curl up and just talk for hours on end about absolutely anything.

Castiel sees Dean sitting at a table by the window. He can’t help but stop on the sidewalk and just stare at him. Dean had always been a good-looking guy, but he’d been more pretty than handsome. Now though, he actually takes Castiel’s breath away. Dean has grown into himself, he’s filled out more and the boyish prettiness replaced with rugged handsomeness. He looks - for want of a more eloquent term - _fucking hot_.

Dean looks up from his drink and sees Castiel staring at him through the window. He smiles, and Castiel can’t help smiling back; Dean always had an infectious smile.

He walks into the café, orders his usual (latte with extra foam) and approaches the table where Dean is sitting.

Dean stands up when he sees Castiel approach and hugs him. 

Castiel doesn’t even think that it’s inappropriate that the man that he was once so deeply in love with is now pressing so close to him that he can smell his aftershave and the leather of his jacket.

Pulling back, Dean says, “You’re looking good, Cas.”

“You too, Dean,” Cas responds as he takes a seat opposite his ex-boyfriend, because he really, really, does.

Dean begins to nervously play with a sugar packet on the table, which draws Cas’ attention to Dean’s hands, and he can’t help but reach out to touch them. Castiel touching Dean - any part of him - always seemed to calm Dean, and now is no exception. Dean drops the packet, stops fidgeting, and frowns at Cas’ hand covering his own.

As soon as Castiel realises what he’s doing - how intimate the act is - he withdraws his hand. Dean flicks his eyes up to Cas’ own at the abruptness of the removal, and there’s an emotion that Castiel registers on Dean’s face. Anger? Regret? _Hurt?_ But before either of them can comment on it, the waitress brings Castiel’s drink over to him and places it on the table, effectively creating a barrier between them.

“So, Dean, tell me,” Castiel says, having a hard time reminding himself not to get lost in Dean’s eyes, “What are you doing these days?”

“Oh, this and that,” Dean says vaguely, “Freelance work, mainly.”

“Sounds mysterious,” Castiel responds, fishing for more information, which Dean does not divulge.

“Not really,” Dean says, “I’m more interested in you, Cas. Shacking up with Dick Roman? I’d never have put you down as a power-grabber.”

“Hey!” Cas says with affront, but it wanes as soon as Dean bursts out laughing.

“You always were easy to wind up,” he says fondly, “I’ve, uh... I’ve missed you.”

“Yeah, me too,” Cas says wistfully, “So, how long are you back in town for?”

Dean grins, “For the foreseeable future.”

Castiel can’t help grinning back. “Good.”

There’s a lull in the conversation after that, and Cas stirs the foam on his latte to avoid Dean’s searing gaze.

Then, out of nowhere, Dean clears his throat and asks, “He treat you right?”

Cas looks up suddenly. “What?”

“Dick,” Dean clarifies, studying Cas’ face, “Does he treat you right?”

Cas is quiet for a moment because he knows that Dean will see through any of his lies. “It’s not always easy, he’s away a lot, but he does the best he can.”

Dean grunts noncommittally. “You’re happy though?”

 “I’m content,” Cas says after a brief pause.

“Doesn’t answer my question.”

Cas huffs. “If you’re asking me if what I feel for Dick is the same as I felt for you, then the answer is no, Dean. I don’t love him the way I loved you, but we broke up. We’re over... We can’t go back to what we had.”

Dean stares at Cas with such intensity that Cas begins to squirm. 

“ _Loved?_ ” Dean says, putting emphasis on the past tense, with an element of hope in his voice.

Castiel ignores the bait in favour of saying, “You could have gotten in contact sooner, Dean.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” Dean responds, “But I’m here now though, aren’t I?”

“Yeah, I suppose you are,” Cas says with a grin.

“You wanna get out of here?”

Cas really doesn’t need to be asked twice.

****

It should seem weird and wrong to bring Dean - _his ex_ , of all people - into the place he calls home; the place he lives with his _current_ boyfriend, but it really, really doesn’t. Besides, Cas reasons to himself that he’s just showing Dean what he made of his life. There’s no crime in that, right?

‘Home’ happens to be a spacious apartment on the fifth floor of a recently built block in one of the best parts of town. It’s not Castiel’s style - it’s too big and impersonal, and slightly pretentious for his tastes - but Dick had been adamant that he couldn’t live in Cas’ ‘cubbyhole’, as he’d somewhat affectionately called it, although Dick hadn’t been quick enough to hide his sneer when he’d said it.

It really doesn’t surprise Cas that Dean pulls him up on the style as he walks around the living room, examining it. “This place isn’t exactly you, Cas.”

“Dick likes it,” is all Cas says. It’s the truth, after all.

“Dick not around?” Dean asks casually as he looks around the apartment, and Cas doesn’t think he imagines the disdain with which Dean says Dick’s name.

“No, he’s working out of town.”

Dean grunts. “Thought you said he took take care of you.”

“He does,” Cas responds defensively.

“Mm, looks like it,” Dean says sarcastically.

“I’m willing to make sacrifices to make what Dick and I have work, Dean,” Cas says tartly.

Dean spins around and walks purposefully towards him. Cas takes an involuntary step backwards and his back hits off the wall.

Even though Dean is only an inch or so taller than Cas, it’s at times like this that the difference really is more profound.

Cas stares straight ahead as Dean crowds him against the wall, looking over Dean’s shoulder - looking anywhere but Dean’s eyes, because he can’t, he can’t look at them, because he doesn’t trust himself not to fall in love with him all over again.

Regardless of Cas not looking at him, Dean maintains eye contact with him. “You shouldn’t have to make sacrifices, Cas. You deserve to be treated right. You deserve someone who knows how special you are. You should be with someone who treasures you.”

Cas tries not to breath, because if he does, he’ll smell Dean’s aftershave and the slight woodsy scent that is just naturally Dean, and he’ll be Dean’s all over again. And he can’t want that. He _can’t_.

And so, Cas is still not looking at Dean when he says weakly, “Dean, stop. Please. Don’t do this.”

“Don’t do what, Cas?”

Cas’ eyes flick to Dean’s for the first time, and as soon as he does, he knows he’s lost.

Dean’s emerald eyes are sparkling and he’s grinning at Cas; fully aware of the effect he’s having on his ex. _Fuck him_ , Cas thinks, _why does he still have to be everything I want?_

Cas at least tries to act as if he’s not falling for Dean again. “You really think that you’re the one I want?”

Dean’s grin falls away, and his eyes are harder now, deadly serious. “We both know I am.”

And before Cas knows what’s happening, Dean’s bends his head towards Cas, and their lips are touching, their teeth clashing because Cas has opened his mouth - he’s given Dean access to his mouth and allowing him to explore and reacquaint himself with what was once his.

Dean kisses like a man starved and Cas supposes that Dean kind of is: he’s been denied this for six long years; six years of not being able to taste what had once been second nature to him. 

Cas has forgotten how good Dean is at this, how he makes Cas practically melt into him. It’s certainly not like this with Dick - Dick isn’t one for kissing, it’s too intimate for his tastes, and even when they do, Cas has to admit that Dick’s not very good at it. Or maybe it’s just that Dean has ruined him for other men.

But why is Cas thinking of Dick now? Dick is a distant memory - someone who exists in the periphery. Here and now is all that matters, and here and now means _Dean_.

Dean bites lightly on Cas’ bottom lip and pulls on it slightly, making Cas buck his hips. Dean, fuck him, had remembered how Cas had always been so susceptible to that.

Cas just surrenders everything to Dean and lets his body just fall into the stronger man. Dean grunts appreciatively. 

“Bedroom?” Cas asks him hoarsely.

Dean chuckles, “Nah, too far. Want you right here.”  Cas strangles a groan. “Dean, we’re in the living room...”

“I know, baby,” Dean chuckles, “I’m gonna fuck you on the couch, up against the wall, against the window, and ...”

Cas groans at all the possibilities, and looks up at Dean when he tapers off.

Cas turns to follow Dean’s gaze, but can’t see what he’s looking at. “What -?”

Dean grins. “Then I’m gonna fuck you on the kitchen table and make you come so hard that you’ll see stars.”

“No, Dean, we can’t...”  

“’Course we can, baby. It’ll be hot,” Dean says with a wicked grin, “I’m gonna fuck you so hard that your nails will dig into the wood, and the next time you eat a meal with Dick, you’ll see the marks you made when _I_ pounded into you. And knowing you, you’ll get so hard thinking about it you’ll probably come right there in front of him.”

Cas shudders, because that is exactly what he wants, to hell with the consequences. He peels Dean’s jacket off his body and throws it away, leaving it discarded on the floor out of the way. Meanwhile, Cas is busy tearing the remainder clothes on Dean’s body off, because he needs him naked _now_.

When Dean’s shirt falls to the floor, Cas is momentarily mesmerised. Dean had always been an athletic guy, but he was positively scrawny compared to the body that standing in front of him now. Cas runs a hand up and down Dean’s chest, feeling his toned abs and firm pecs, and he new fantasies are forming in his mind, wanting Dean to pick him up with those strong arms and just hold him and never, ever let him go.

“Like what you see, baby?” Dean asks cockily.

Cas rolls his eyes but ghosts his hand over the tattoo on Dean’s left pec that he had gotten as a symbol of their relationship. 

“You still have it,” Cas says with wonder.

 “’Course I do, baby,” Dean says, “It’d be a bitch to get removed.”

Cas pinches Dean’s nipple in retribution - Dean hisses in pleasure - but laughs anyway, because Cas knows that’s not the truth, he knows that Dean would never get it removed because of what it symbolised; of what Cas meant to him.

Cas begins to pepper kisses along Dean’s strong jawline at the same time as he tries to loosens Dean’s belt. Fumbling, he finally gets the belt open and pulls on it firmly so that it’s finally free and allows Cas to begin working on the buttons of Dean’s jeans. _Why does there have to be so many obstacles between them?_

When the jeans are finally opened, they break apart as Dean shucks out of them and peels his boxers off too. Cas takes the opportunity to rid himself of his own clothes. And when he’s done, his eyes are drawn downwards to Dean’s erection, it’s there standing heavy, long and proud and Cas is reminded of all the times it drove him absolutely crazy for Dean. His mouth salivates at the thought of what he can do to Dean’s cock, and, perhaps more importantly, what _it_ can do to _him_.

But he’s in a teasing mood right now, so rather than dropping to his knees, and taking Dean in his mouth, he moves his over to Dean’s nipples and takes one then the other into his mouth. Dean gasps at the sensation. He then growls when Cas teases them with his teeth, pulling slightly on them. Dean always did have really sensitive nipples.

Cas kisses his way down Dean’s chest, nipping at the skin here and there, running his hands over Dean’s abs once again just to feel his muscles, until he gets to the light golden hair on Dean’s navel. He’s so close to Dean’s erection that he has to calm himself, and if the controlling gasps that Dean’s emitting mean anything, he’s trying to calm himself too.

Cas decides that he’s waited six years for this, and he’s not willing to wait anymore.

He kisses the tip of Dean’s cock and Dean nearly growls with the sensation. Clearly pleased with the response, Cas runs his tongue along Dean’s shaft and kisses it at random points.

“Baby, c’mon,” Dean gasps out.

With a grin, Cas decides that Dean has been patient enough. Cas wets his lips and then opens his mouth. Dean hisses out in pleasure at the feeling of Cas’ warm, wet mouth around him; whilst Cas moans around Dean at the feeling of the velvet skin on his tongue.

They’ve both missed this.

Dean’s a big boy, and Cas has never been able to take all of him in his mouth, and so, when he’s got as much of Dean as he feels comfortable with in his mouth, he places his hand around the remainder of Dean and makes a fist, working Dean over with flicks of his wrist.

“Yeah, baby, that’s it,” Dean groans.

Cas takes pleasure in the praise, and keeps up his efforts, which just elicit groans and moans from Dean.

“Slow down, baby,” Dean says after countless minutes worth of bobbing his head forward and back, “Don’t wanna come just yet. Wanna fuck you first.”

Dean removes his cock from Cas’ mouth - Cas is slightly disappointed that he didn’t get to taste Dean’s come after all these years - but he reasons that they’ve got all day and night. 

Slapping Cas’ ass slightly, Dean guides him over to the large window that overlooks the city.

Cas has his hands flat against the pane of glass and spread his legs subconsciously. He feels Dean come up behind him, and Dean’s hand stretches over his shoulder.

Guiding two fingers to Cas’ mouth, Dean simply says, “Suck.”

Cas does, taking Dean’s fingers into his mouth and sucking on them greedily, getting them as wet as he possibly can. Satisfied, Dean removes his fingers from Cas’ mouth with a distinct _pop_.

Cas suddenly feels Dean’s fingers between his cheeks, teasing at his hole. Dean slides one finger in without much resistance, and after a few seconds of testing, adds the other finger. He begins to scissor Cas, stretching him open, getting him ready for his cock.

Dean groans, “Fuck, baby, how are you so tight?”

Cas is glad that he’s got his back to Dean because he’s pretty sure he’s blushing crimson. He doesn’t want to admit to Dean just how long it’s been since he’s had sex, but at the same time, Dean would probably get off on it, knowing that he’d be the one to break Cas’ dry spell.

Dean takes his time in opening Cas up; so much so that Cas wants to scream at him to just _fuck him already_ , but he won’t. He won’t deny Dean the pleasure he gets from this, and to be honest Cas is enjoying the attention being lavished on him too.

Cas moans with loss when Dean retracts his fingers, and wanders over to his jeans to find his wallet. Dean comes back moments later with a condom and a travel-size bottle of lube.   “You ready baby?” Dean asks as he rolls the condom on himself.

“Please, Dean,” Cas whines, “Need you.”

“I know you do, baby,” Dean says, lubing himself up and applying lube to Cas’ hole for good measure, “I’m gonna give you what you need, promise.”

Cas doesn’t even question Dean because he knows the other man isn’t lying.

Cas gasps when he feels the head of Dean’s cock nudge against the tight ring of muscle before it’s finally nestled inside him. Dean moves slowly, giving Cas time to adjust to him. It burns slightly, but this is Dean - of course his size is going to be painful - but Cas can work through it because he knows that the pain’ll go soon and be replaced by the best feeling in the world.

Despite Dean’s care, Cas still grunts as he takes Dean fully inside of him. He hears someone groan out, “ _Fuck!_ ”, and realises belatedly that it’s probably him. Dean, for his part, begins to mouth and kiss Cas’ shoulder blades trying to distract the other man from the pain.

Cas actually sighs when Dean’s deep inside him; finally home, exactly where he belongs.

And then Dean finally - _finally_ \- begins to roll his hips. At first it’s slow and Cas can feel every single movement that Dean makes. Cas could actually weep at how good it feels.

Soon, though, it’s too slow for him. He’s not going to break, he’s taken Dean many times before, and sure it’s been a while, but he needs it. “Faster, Dean, please.”

He hears Dean chuckle from behind him. “Okay, baby.”

Dean begins to roll his hips once more, faster this time, giving Cas what he wants, and for Cas this is absolute heaven - he’s with the only man he’s ever truly loved and he’s being filled so much that’s he’s wondering how he’s survived the past six years without him.

Dean begins to pound into him harder and faster and the force causes the pane of glass to vibrate ever so slightly.

“See this Cas?” Dean whispers into his ear, still fucking him deep, “This whole world is _ours_. You and me, no-one else.”

Cas whimpers because he can’t speak, not now, not while he’s so fucking full.

“ _He_ might be able to buy you whatever you want, but he can’t give you what you _need_ ,” Dean says lowly with a possessive tone, “ _I’m_ what you need. Aren’t I baby?” 

He ends that sentence with a particularly angular thrust that he hits Cas’ prostate just so, causing Cas to scream “Yes!”, as he comes, the window pane painted with his spunk.

True to his word, Dean has made him come so hard that Cas thinks he actually whites out for a few seconds, because when he comes to, he’s sitting on the edge of the kitchen table, with his legs swinging over the edge, legs parted as Dean’s standing in between them.

Dean looks concerned as he asks, “You okay, baby?”

Cas breaks out into a loopy grin, “Fucking amazing, Dean. Haven’t come like that in so long.”

Dean grins too, “’Course you haven’t baby, you haven’t been _with me_ in so long.”  And yeah, that’s disturbingly true. Cas hasn’t experienced pleasure like that in... yeah, six years.

As Dean begins to explore Cas’ mouth with his tongue once again, Cas feels something poking against his leg. He knows it’s Dean’s erection; he hasn’t even come yet.

Cas pulls back from the kiss reluctantly and gestures towards Dean’s still hard cock, “Dean, you haven’t...”

Dean looks down at himself, grins, and says, “I know, baby. Don’t worry, I’m not through with you yet.”

Cas gasps out as Dean begins to bite and kiss against his neck. Cas knows what Dean’s doing. He should tell him to stop, tell him that he can’t mark him, because he’ll have to hide the hickeys. He should tell him, but he doesn’t. He knows he’s going to have to wear turtlenecks when Dick returns, but he doesn’t care, it’s worth it to have the feeling of Dean biting and sucking against his skin. Cas doesn’t even feel a pinch of remorse at what he’s letting Dean do, and isn’t that something? But then again, he reasons that Dean isn’t doing anything wrong. Dean is just reclaiming what’s his. 

“You ready for round two?” Dean asks huskily.

Cas doesn’t even think about saying ‘no’.

Dean cradles the back of Cas’ head in one of his hands as he pushes Cas further back onto the table so that Cas’ hole becomes more accessible to him.

When Cas is lying flat on the table, Dean lifts his Cas’ thighs up and places his legs over his shoulders. Cas is stretched and the position is not the most comfortable in the world, but he doesn’t care because he knows the pleasure that Dean’s going to give him will be worth any minor aches that he might experience in the process.

“You looking fucking beautiful like this, Cas,” Dean says huskily, as he enters him once again, “All stretched out and aching for my cock.”

Cas should feel shame at the words, but he doesn’t. All he does is groan in response to Dean.

Dean enters him in one smooth thrust and Cas can’t help crying out in pleasure.

“So good baby, so good for me,” Dean says.

Dean begins to slam into him again and again, and Cas can’t help digging into the wood of the table, desperately trying to find purchase against Dean’s movements. He knows Dean’s getting closer, he can feel the heat pool in his own belly and he wants nothing more than for Dean to find his release inside him; like he used to before.

The thrusts last for a few more seconds before Dean suddenly starts to stutter, and slamming home once again, getting as far and as deep inside Cas as he possibly can, Dean slumps over him, riding out his orgasm.

Although he doesn’t white out this time, Cas comes right across his belly without the aid of his hand again - that’s always a plus - and when Dean slumps over him, Cas thinks he can feel the condom inside him expand with Dean’s come inside it. And that really shouldn’t be as hot as it is.

As Dean orgasms, Cas clenches his legs around Dean, drawing him closer and strokes his hand up and down the other man’s back; just for the contact, for memory’s sake, for the feeling of just holding and touching Dean as much as possible.

They stay like that for a while longer, Dean lying over Cas. When Dean softens sufficiently, he pulls out, and Cas winces.

“Sorry,” Dean says apologetically.

Cas shakes his head and smirks, “Don’t be.”

Dean removes the condom with his come in it, and turns to Cas with a grin. “You want me to leave this on Dick’s bedside table? Show him you’ve been fucked by someone else?”

Cas rolls his eyes as Dean’s immaturity, and Dean goes into the bathroom to flush the condom - and evidence of their encounter - down the toilet. But Dean’s words hit home and the guilt sets in, as it inevitably does after he’s come down from his high. 

_What the fuck has he just done?_ He’s lying on the kitchen table absolutely fucked out - and true to his word Dean actually made him scratch the surface with his nails - after being impaled upon his ex’s dick. Dean returns to the living room, picking up his jeans from the floor. Guilt begins to gnaw at Cas, because he’s really not that kind of person; he’s not an adulterer, he’s loyal and he’s honest. But this is what Dean Winchester does to him.

Dean is buttoning up his jeans and he’s still topless, his muscles ripple as he tightens his belt, and Cas’ cock gives a feeble twitch of interest; Dean’s body alone turns Cas on so much. He really is screwed. 

When Dean finally has his jeans on, he looks over at Cas with a smirk. “Don’t feel guilty, baby. This was always going to happen. You and me; we’re made for each other.”

_And yeah_ , Cas thinks, _they probably are_. And isn’t that just so fucked up?

“Listen, baby,” Dean says, “I hate to fuck and run, normally I’d stay for the pillow talk, but I’ve got an interview across town that I really can’t miss.”

Cas doesn’t say anything or even move, but the ghost of some emotion must flicker on his face, maybe it registers with Dean that he’s doing exactly what Dick does to Cas, because Dean comes over and leans over him.

“ _Hey_ ,” Dean says firmly, “I’m coming back.”

And with that, Dean kisses him deeply, his tongue once again exploring Cas’ mouth.

“We really have to do this again real soon,” Dean says with a wink, “Because I’m pretty sure we still have to fuck on the couch.” 

There’s no doubt in Cas’ mind that Dean will stick to his word, and he can’t help but grin at the prospect of another encounter with his ex-boyfriend.

****

And Dean does indeed stick to his word. In fact, he’s back the very next day.

Cas has spent the day kneeling in front of Dean, sucking his dick so far down his throat that he has carpet burn on his knees and he’ll no doubt have a sore throat come the morning. His back will also no doubt be in agony in the morning; he’s been slammed against the wall, fucked on the wood floor, rimmed and screwed against the glass shower door and once again in the jacuzzi just for good measure. And yes, they’d also fucked on the couch.

After their exhaustive day, they had ordered pizza, and now they’re both on the same recliner, relaxing and watching a re-run of _Dr. Sexy_. Dean’s lying flat out on the seat, with Cas lying on top of him, his head nuzzled under Dean’s own. Cas’ hand is under Dean’s t-shirt, running his hand absently up and down Dean’s six-pack. It would be the perfect picture of domesticity, if it weren’t for the fact that the man he’s lying here with is not his boyfriend.

“Come away with me.”

It comes out of nowhere. 

Well, not exactly nowhere, Cas has known that this must have been on the cards, but it’s the first time that Dean has voiced as much.

 Even though Dean doesn’t say it, Cas can hear what Dean really wants to say, ‘Break up with him.’

Cas’ hand stills against Dean, and when he doesn’t respond straight away, the silence that hangs between them just grows more awkward. In fact, Cas only answers when it’s clear that Dean won’t say anything else. 

He wants to go with Dean. He really, really does. It would be everything he’s ever wanted. He doesn’t know what he’d do about his job, or what they’d do for money, but it wouldn’t matter because they’d be together. They’d have each other, and there’d be no fear of getting caught. But it’s a pipe dream. He can’t go with Dean. Not in reality.

“Dean, I...” Cas trails off, searching for the right way to say it, but there’s no other way but the harsh truth, “I can’t.”

Dean doesn’t say anything. He may tense slightly - Cas doesn’t know if he imagines it or not - but Dean doesn’t _do_ anything. And that’s probably the worst thing Dean could do: nothing.

Finally, when the silence gets too much, Cas practically begs, “Dean, say something.”

“Okay.” It’s said in an emotionless tone.

“I’m sorry,” Cas says, trying to diffuse the potential shitstorm that he’s (potentially) unleashed, “I can’t break up with him in the middle of a campaign. He needs to focus on that. It wouldn’t be fair.”

“It’s okay, Cas,” Dean says, and hugs him just a little bit tighter.

Cas just hopes he hasn’t blown this whole thing they have together, but holds onto Dean just a little bit tighter, just in case it’s the last time they’ll be together.

****

It’s when Cas hasn’t seen Dean for three days after that that he decides it’s probably over between them.

Maybe it’s for the best.

But that doesn’t stop the hurt.

****

Typically, Dick actually _does_ return home that weekend. And all the time that Cas spends with him, he’s sitting there thinking about nothing but Dean and the way he makes him feel.

He feels guilty, of course he does, he’d been fucked by his ex on the very couch that they’re now curled up on watching some crappy afternoon made-for-television-movie. Well, he says curled up, but Dick doesn’t exactly _do_ affectionate, so it’s just Cas resting his head against Dick’s shoulder.

In fact, his heartbeat speeds up when, during the ad break, Dick moves over to the window overlooking the city and says, “I’ve always loved that view”. For a second, Cas thinks that Dick somehow knows that Dean took him up against the window and made him come so hard across the pane of glass. And hadn’t that been a pain to clean up?

But Dick can’t know, Cas rationalises. That’s not possible. 

But there’s a little part of him, a little sick and twisted part, that _wants_ Dick to know; to know that his boyfriend had been fucked to within an inch of his life by his ex and that he’d enjoyed it; and that even though he’d turned down Dean’s offer to leave with him, he’s wants to be fucked by him again, and again, and again.

“Castiel? Castiel?”

Cas snaps back to reality and looks apologetically at Dick.

“Sorry?”

“I said that I’ve got to go to a meeting a City Hall.”

“Oh,” Cas says and at least tries to sound disappointed, “That’s a shame.”

 Dick chuckles at him, “I know. I’m sorry.” 

 “It’s okay, Dick,” he says, “Really.”

“You’re too good for me,” Dick says.

_If only you knew_ , Cas thinks. Instead, he just smiles.

****

Dick’s gone probably five minutes when the doorbell rings.

Cas gets up, and thinking that it’s Dick who’s forgotten his keys, opens the door expectantly.

Except instead of Dick Roman, it’s -

“Dean.”

“Hey, baby,” he says with a grin, “Saw your boyfriend just leaving, and I thought you might be miserable all on your lonesome.”

Cas can’t help the grin that breaks out on his face because Dean’s here. Even if he wants to break up, Cas gets to see him once last time. “You want to come in?”

“I’d rather come in _you_ ... But if that’s the best offer I’m gonna get, I’ll take it.”

Cas flushes as he steps aside to let him in, “Dean!”

“Oh, don’t get self-conscious on me now, baby,” Dean says with a grin, as Cas steps aside and lets Dean enter the apartment.

Closing the door, Cas says, “I didn’t think you’d... Y’know after what I said.”

“I told you I was okay with it, Cas, it’s your life, I’m not here to ruin it,” Dean says, “But I can’t stand the thought of his hands all over you. You’re _mine_ , Cas. You’ll always be mine.”

Cas wants to agree, wants to say, ‘Always’, but he can’t because Dean’s tongue is down his throat, and he thinks that’s a good enough alternative.

Besides, all thoughts of coherent sentences go out of his mind when Dean fucking picks him up, Dean’s arms around the back of Cas’ thigh as he carries him to the bedroom. And yeah, Cas’ new kink for being picked up by Dean’s strong arms is now being realised. Just when he thought it couldn’t get any better between them, Dean goes and does this.

They don’t break apart for the short walk to the bedroom; Cas’ tongue fighting against Dean’s in a futile display for dominance. Cas knows he won’t win, but he’s having fun doing it, so who the fuck cares?

Dean kicks the door to the bedroom closed and drops Cas down onto the bed.

Dean divests himself of his clothes in record time, whilst Cas sits there enjoying the show. After a couple of seconds, he realises that he could actually be involved in this particular show, and so gets going.

Dean seems to know exactly what Cas wants, because after prepping him sufficiently, he picks him up again and Cas can’t actually quite believe that Dean’s fucking him against a wall while he’s got his arms locked around Dean’s head and his legs wrapped around Dean’s waist.

It’s a whole lot more intimate and invasive than their previous encounters, because in this position, Dean is able to eye-fuck Cas’ eyes; tongue fuck his mouth; and fuck his tight hole.

Cas is in bliss and lets Dean just take whatever the fuck he wants to take from his body. He doesn’t care anymore; how could he when he’s being fucked so expertly that he wants be filled like this twenty-four hours a day for the rest of his life?

****

They lose track of time. Dick hadn’t said how long he’d be, but meetings in City Hall don’t usually run over three hours.

They’re lying on Dick and Cas’ bed - and Cas has just realised it’s the first time they’d had sex in an actual bed since they’d started their affair - and the sheets are messy and stained with both of their come. Dean has just stopped panting, and Cas is resting his head on Dean’s chest, when he hears his phone chime with a text. It’s from Dick saying he’s stopping for a take-away as a way of saying sorry for leaving him earlier and that he’ll be home in less than ten minutes.

Time seems to slow down. And then it speeds up again. Dean, who’s dozing by Cas is unceremoniously awoken with an elbow to the ribs.

“Ow, Cas! What the hell?” he asks with a bitch-face that’s eerily reminiscent of Sam’s.

“You’ve gotta go,” Cas says, panicked.

 He’s got so much to do: get Dean out of here, throw the dirty sheets in the wash, get clean sheets, put the clean sheets on the bed, make sure he’s got all of his clothes on right, make sure that Dean hasn’t accidentally left something behind (again), then he has to have a shower, and come up with a plausible reason for Dick as to why the sheets are in the wash at seven o’clock at night. All of that and he has less than ten minutes to do it in.

And Dean sure as hell isn’t helping any. He’s deliberately slow in getting dressed while Cas is practically ripping the sheets off the bed.

“Dean, please,” Cas begs, “Will you hurry up?”

When he’s finally dressed, Dean turns to Cas with a look of soul crushing hurt, kisses him softly on the cheek, and leaves the bedroom without saying anything. Thirty seconds later Cas hears the front door close.

He doesn’t have time to breathe, though, and gets to work trying to rid the room of any evidence of what’s just happened here.

Not five minutes later the front door opens again.

****

Cas doesn’t know how, but he manages it; he makes up some lie that he just rolls off his tongue when Dick asks about the washing machine whirring away. Lies have been coming so easily to Cas these days.

And when they sit down to a take-away dinner, Cas is finally able to breathe easy again.

Dick talks about his meeting whilst Cas tries to pay attention. It’s pretty hard when all he can remember is the hurt look on Dean’s face when Cas had told him he needed to leave.

Cas snaps his attention back to the present when Dick directly addresses him.

“Darling,” Dick says to Castiel, “Now that it’s official that I’m in the running for governor, I’ll be away a lot more frequently.”

“Dick, we’ve been through this,” Castiel responds, “I know that -”

“ _So_ ,” Dick interrupts pointedly, “With that in mind, and with the increase in hate-mail I’ve already begun to receive already, I’ve taken the executive decision to hire a bodyguard for you.”

“Really, Dick,” Cas says after taking that in, “Don’t you think that’s taking it a bit too far?”

“Nonsense,” Dick says, “Your safety is important to me. Besides, I’ve already held the interview and I’ve found the perfect person for the job.”

“If you think it’s best,” Cas says, resigned to his fate. He guesses it really is over between him and Dean now; he doubts he could bribe the bodyguard that Dick’s paying into letting Cas carry out his not-so-sordid affair.

 “I do,” Dick says with a sense of finality.

****

When Dick goes for his shower, the first thing Cas thinks of is calling Dean. He can’t bear to go to sleep knowing that he’d put that hurt expression on Dean’s face.

“Yeah?” Dean says as he answers the phone.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas says.

And despite everything, Dean brightens a little at the sound of Cas’ voice, “Hey, Cas.”

“Dean, I’m so sorry about earlier,” Cas says, “I just panicked. The thought of Dick finding us...”

“You don’t have to explain, Cas,” Dean says, cutting him off, “I know I’m just the ‘other man’, or whatever the term is.”

“No, Dean!” Cas says angrily, “You are not just the other man. You have no idea what you mean to me. I love you, Dean.”

Dean chuckles. “I love you too, Cas.”

There’s silence on between them for a moment, both letting their admissions sink in. Eventually, Dean’s the one that breaks it.

“You’re breaking up with me, or whatever you do to end an affair, aren’t you?” He says with a sense of resignation.

Cas lets out a pained noise. “I don’t want to, Dean, believe me. I want to keep seeing you, it’s just going to be a whole lot harder now because Dick’s hired a bodyguard for me.”

“A bodyguard?” Dean asks incredulously.

“Yeah, I know,” Cas huffs, “He’ll probably have hired some overweight guy with a million tattoos, with no sense of humour or even a personality, who’ll just stand there behind me all day long.”

Dean sighs, “We’ll work it out, Cas. We always do.”

“I know,” Cas says, “Look, I better go. I love you, Dean.”

“Love you too, Cas.”

And yeah, it’s really good to hear Dean say those words as they hang up.

****

Cas doesn’t have sex with Dick that night; it’s a combination of him not wanting to touch the other man, and the fact that as soon as Dick lies down he’s fast asleep.

Cas spends the night tossing and turning in his bed. He runs through all the possible scenarios of what to do about Dean. No matter which he chooses to do, it’ll be difficult.

It’s dawn by the time he feels his eyes droop, and it doesn’t surprise him when he doesn’t wake until lunchtime.

He gets dressed quickly, preparing to make his apologies to Dick, when he hears voices from the living room. He wasn’t aware that Dick was expecting anyone today. Then again, he doesn’t really keep up with his boyfriend’s appointment diary these days.

Just as he’s about to make his way to the door, it opens and Dick walks in.

 “Oh, Castiel, you’re awake. Good. Come on, I’ve got someone I need to introduce you to.”

The sense of dread in Cas’ belly rises. 

_This is it_ , Cas thinks, the bodyguard is here and then it’s bye-bye Dean.

Cas follows Dick out of the bedroom.

“Castiel,” Dick says, as they enter the living room, “Allow me to introduce your new personal bodyguard; Dean Winchester.”

Castiel’s body freezes, and he frowns as Dean stands up from his position on the same couch that they’d fucked on not a week beforehand.

“Mr. Novak,” Dean says with a small grin, extending his hand, “It’s a pleasure to meet you. I believe that we’re going to be spending a lot of time together.”

Castiel snaps back to the present and extends his hand automatically, taking Dean’s firm grasp into his hand.

At the same time, Dick’s phone chimes. He excuses himself to answer the phone and leaves Cas and Dean alone.

“What are you doing here?” Cas asks urgently.

“I told you I had an interview,” Dean says in a relaxed tone, “And I told you I’d be around for the foreseeable future. I don’t see why you’re so surprised.”

“You didn’t tell me you’d gotten a job _here_ ,” Cas says with slight hysteria in his voice.

“Yeah, well,” Dean responds calmly, “I told you that I don’t like the idea of his hands on you. I told you that you’re mine, Cas, and I meant it. I found you again, and I’m sure as hell not gonna leave you again.”

Cas is actually left speechless at the sincerity in Dean’s voice.

Before he’s given a chance to respond, Dick walks back into the room.

 “It’s good to see that you get on well,” Dick says, who has probably overheard their hushed conversation.

“You didn’t doubt that we would, did you Mr. Roman?” Dean says cockily.

But Dick just laughs at Dean’s comment. “Of course not. And I’ve told you, Dean, call me ‘Dick’.”

“Listen, darling,” Dick says, turning to Castiel, “I’ve been called into the office. I’m sorry. I’ll be back later.”

Cas doesn’t say anything, he’s so used to Dick saying some variation of that to him, that it’s become second nature at this point.

“Dean,” Dick says, turning back to Dean, “looks like you’ll be starting work a bit earlier than planned. I’ll need you to take care of Castiel for a couple of hours while I’m gone.”

Dean smiles while Cas chuckles uncomfortably. 

“That’s not a problem, Dick,” Dean says with a grin, “Taking care of Cas is my number one priority now.”

Cas’ cock gives an involuntary twitch when Dean says that. _Fuck_.


End file.
